Quirk Books
How to Survive a Horror Movie - Book
Are you reading this in a cornfield, at a summer camp, or in an abandoned mental institution? Have you noticed that everything is poorly lit, or that music surges every time you open a door? If the answer is yes, you’re probably trapped in a horror movie. But don’t freak out—just read this book! With it you will learn how to overcome every obstacle found in scary films, including:• How to determine what type of horror film you’re trapped in• The five types of slashers and how to defeat them• How to handle killer dolls, murderous automobiles, and other haunted objects• How to deal with alien invasions, zombie apocalypses, and other global threats• What to do if you did something last summer, if your corn has children in it, or if you suspect you’re already dead(This book may contain a small, black sharpie mark on the bottom edge, so that it can't be returned to a different wholesaler.)
UPC/ISBN: 9781683691464
Product Information
Due to the nature of collectible items and ever changing market demand, we are unable to cancel pre-orders on ratio variants and select other items (1 per store variants, exclusive covers, ect) for a refund.For preorders on regular open order comics (the majority of which are normally cover price), we can cancel preorders and refund with a store credit that can be used in our brick and mortar stores or at thirdeyecomics.com
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Cover art for Comics on our website is provided to us at the time of solicit. While we do our best to keep these images up to date; some covers may be subject to change!
At Third Eye, we ship thousands of comics every week, and we know condition matters. Whether you're reading, collecting, or grading, we want you to feel confident when a Third Eye package arrives.
This policy outlines our standard for new release and shipped comics, and the industry-standard guidelines we follow.
OUR STANDARD
Books without a stated grade will be offered as Near Mint 9.4 or better. We do not guarantee 9.8 condition on any book unless specifically noted.
We use industry-standard grading guidelines from:
- CBCS Comic Grading Scale
- Overstreet Comic Grading Standards
- CGC grading standards
If you're new to comic grading, the resources above are a great place to start.
WHY WE DON'T GUARANTEE 9.8
Modern comic printing is an imperfect process. Books are printed in massive
runs, bound at high speed, and shipped in bulk to retailers. Even brand
new books off the truck will exhibit minor production characteristics,
and that's normal, and consistent with industry standards across every
retailer.
A 9.8 grade represents near-perfection, and the reality is that not every printed book qualifies for that grade no matter where you buy it from.
We can absolutely commit to NM 9.4 or better. We cannot commit to 9.8 on every book, because that's not how comics are made.
WHAT QUALIFIES AS NM 9.4
Per industry standards, a book may exhibit the following minor characteristics and still grade as Near Mint 9.4, as long as there's no accumulation of defects:
Bindery characteristics:
- Minor to moderate corner tears
- White edges along the spine (common on most modern printings)
- Covers slightly offset from interior pages (common on cardstock covers)
Printing characteristics:
- Slight color rub on back covers
- Small paper wrinkles present from the paper roll prior to printing
- Wavy paper texture from the printing process
Spine characteristics:
- 2-3 small color-breaking spine ticks
- Minor non-color-breaking spine dings
These are normal modern production characteristics, not damage from handling or shipping. They are present on books across the industry, regardless
of retailer.
OUR RETURN & EXCHANGE POLICY
We do not accept returns or exchanges on books that meet our NM 9.4 or better standard.
We will replace or refund:
- Books damaged during shipping (clear shipping damage, not pre-existing print characteristics)
- Books that fall below NM 9.4 standard (significant spine damage, major creasing, tears, etc.)
- Wrong cover or wrong issue shipped
For premium variants (1:25, 1:50, 1:100, 1:250, 1:500 incentive covers, signed editions, exclusive variants), we apply enhanced QC during pull and packing. If a premium variant arrives outside our standard, contact us within 7 days of delivery and we will work with you on a replacement.
QUESTIONS?
If you have questions about a specific book or want to learn more about comic grading, our team is happy to help. Reach out to service@thirdeyecomics.com.
We appreciate your trust in Third Eye Comics, and we're committed to delivering books that meet the standards both you and we expect.

